Here’s a harsh truth for you: Most guys in the seduction community don’t get laid.
In fact, the guys who consume the most seduction material tend to get the worst results.
This is the same pattern as in any other activity in life, for reasons which will soon become clear.
Imagine this for a moment: You’re in a room with two sexually inexperienced young men—Vince and Fred.
They’re both the same age, height, weight, physique, socio-economic status, and they both have similar levels of inexperience.
You then ask both men to read The Desired Man and execute its steps, but both men take completely different approaches to doing this.
Vince reads through the book once and begins executing its steps, so he begins actively approaching women two weeks after setting up his system.
He doesn’t get a response from the first 5 girls he meets (due to nerves and inexperience), but he persists.
Fred also reads through the book, but he doesn’t take any action.
He’s more interested in learning than doing, so he decides to continue scrolling on Twitter—liking and following more masculinity/seduction accounts, even buying more books.
Who’s going to get laid?
The answer is obvious. Vince is going to get laid. It may even take him several attempts, but he’ll get laid. And he’ll eventually end up with a rotation of 3-5 girls if he repeatedly implements all the steps and recommendations outlined in the book.
The Two Types of Secrets
Does this mean my MAD-EESI system is ineffective? Does its requirement (of multiple attempts) mean it doesn’t work?
The answer is “no”. The book contains secrets that will definitely improve your interactions with women. A secret is simply a piece of information that gives you an advantage over someone who doesn’t know (or use) it.
But there are two types of secrets, in my experience. Gateway Secrets and Execution Secrets.
The information within the book falls under Gateway Secrets. Gateway Secrets are secrets you can learn just by being told or shown. Their job is to expand your mind—to show you your mistakes, and to help you rethink what’s possible.
They “work”, but they’re incomplete. Not because information is deliberately being withheld from you, but because there are certain things that can only be learned by doing. I call these Execution Secrets.
Gateway Secrets always form the foundation for Execution Secrets. For example, before you read The Desired Man, you probably didn’t realise you were doing a lot of things wrong with regards to attracting and arousing women.
Maybe you tried being a “nice guy”, or maybe you tried inviting girls over to your place within seconds of meeting them. Either way, you were doing certain things that sabotaged your efforts.
But you (should) now know women have two attraction systems: the Attraction-Arousal System and the Anti-Slut Defence System.
And you (should) also now know you must first trigger the Attraction-Arousal System before you soothe the Anti-Slut Defence System.
These are Gateway Secrets. Just knowing them improves your effectiveness a bit by giving you mental targets to focus on. So you don’t stumble around blindly when trying to attract women.
The most important thing with Gateway Secrets is to ensure they’re as “pure” and practical as possible.
Many people sabotage their potential by reading wrong or “diluted” information, but that’s a discussion for another day. For now, we’re going to focus on practicality.
The Hidden Danger of Gateway Secrets
There’s a trap associated with gathering knowledge. If you study too much without using the information “in field”, your accumulated knowledge becomes more and more distorted with every new piece of information you encounter.
When you encounter a new idea in a video or book, you’ll often envision yourself in a hypothetical situation similar to the one being described. Then your emotions, hopes, fears, and dreams will fill in the blanks that weren’t described by the author.
It happens to all of us. This little daydream is a great way to get started on internalising an idea, but it usually bears little resemblance to the way things would play out in reality.
So you have to put what you’ve learned to the test. Real life experiences give you the chance to form a more realistic interpretation of the idea without your emotions filling in the blanks so much.
But the more you read without taking action, the more you’ll fantasise. So if you don’t get any real world experience with the idea, your understanding of it will degrade over time and turn into something that won’t work that well in real life.
Eventually, the information will become so distorted that it actually moves you backwards. That’s right, it’s possible to move backwards in learning. Every single day, every single moment, you are either moving backwards or moving forwards.
So when I say “women are aroused by physical and psychological dominance”, you’ll get some idiot with zero experience who’ll fantasise then say something like this:
That’s assault/battery, not seduction. And yes, further interactions with him revealed he was serious but clueless about women.
Twitter has now banned this toxic incel for other hateful messaging, but I’m sure he’s back on there using some burner accounts. Maybe he’s even reading this post right now. Don’t be like him. Instead, let him be a warning to you.
And understand this: The ideas you study are like milk in the fridge. If you don’t get them out to the dinner table (reality) within a week or two, they start to spoil. Then they start to stink up everything in your whole fridge.
That’s when you really start moving backwards. A man who starts out genuinely confused by female nature will turn into a misogynistic incel over time, precisely because he doesn’t take action.
This is the kind of man who gives the male self-improvement space a bad name. He ends up corrupting the good information on there with his own toxic understanding, caused by flawed fantasies and a lack of action.
Inaction always poisons the mind and weakens the man, this makes it the total opposite of Game.
The Importance of Execution Secrets
Every time you come across new information (or review familiar ones) your mind filters it through your current level of understanding and experience.
So your first encounter with a Gateway Secret leads to an “a-ha!” or “wow!” moment. This is what a lot of people hope for when they buy information products or sign up for coaching/seminars.
It’s a really fun thing. The a-ha moment is tremendously important because it opens the door to internalising the information. However, this a-ha moment isn’t the end of the learning process, it’s actually just the beginning.
The first time you hear an idea, you may agree with it, you may even try to act on it, but it does not truly become a part of you until you’ve heard that idea many more times and acted on it many more times.
For example: more things will “jump out” at you when you read The Desired Man a second time.
Why? Because the human mind doesn’t remember or understand everything it reads the first time round. And getting some in-field experience will lead you to even deeper levels of understanding
So this is how a productive learning experience might play out for you:
- You encounter a Gateway Secret, then you say to yourself “A-ha! Yes, that makes sense.”
- You evaluate the source and say to yourself “Wow, that author is a pretty smart guy.”
- You think back to a time when something similar happened to you and say to yourself “ohhh, that’s why that girl called me back, but the other girl wouldn’t.”
- You then take the information and use it in a real interaction.
- You look back on that interaction and process it using the original idea in the Gateway Secret. You come to a new level of understanding.
- You use it again, and this time you get a different result from what you expected.
- You analyse this new result, then come to an even deeper level of understanding.
- You become “emotionally familiar” with the process through repeated exposure and practice. This makes you less nervous and leads to even better results.
- You become observant enough to notice the idea happening to other people in their interactions.
- You apply the idea without having to think too hard, and can stack new ideas on top of it for even more effective results.
Eventually you’ll execute the idea so many times that you automatically act on it. You won’t even have to think about it anymore. This is the point where you’ve internalised the information and made it a permanent part of yourself.
When you internalise a large number of powerful ideas, and you don’t have to work very hard to apply them, you develop a high-powered database with a super fast search mechanism. That’s when you start getting really good.
You’ll instinctively understand what you should be doing and what you shouldn’t be doing. You’ll be remembering instead of thinking, and you’ll know what comes next in real time.
But if you never take any action, your understanding will be of low quality, you’ll never get there.
“Before I learned the art, a punch was just a punch, and a kick, just a kick. After I learned the art, a punch was no longer a punch, a kick no longer a kick. Now that I understand the art, a punch is just a punch and a kick is just a kick.”
—Bruce Lee
Gateway Secrets are the difference between the uninitiated and the apprentice.
Execution Secrets are the difference between the apprentice and the master.
So learn new information, then gain experience.
“I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.”
—Confucius
Till we meet again.
May you grow stronger and stronger, without limit, in all things.
AJ Newport (@LearnThisSecret)
P.S. The next secret will reveal the vetting process you must use to screen women for a relationship.
Please don’t miss it.
