Dear King,
The last Secret built on the idea of psychological dominance by teaching you how to talk dirty to a woman in bed.
It’s now time to tackle the main event: physical dominance.
This is what any girl you attract has been anticipating from the moment she first met you.
Psychological dominance builds up sexual tension, while physical dominance releases it.
This is why I say foreplay begins from the moment you meet a girl.
Your calm, dominant behaviour makes a promise (of intense sex) to her.
You amplify the power of that promise by psychologically dominating her mind during foreplay.
And you deliver on it through physically dominating her body during intercourse.
Physical Dominance
Women are turned on by physical dominance. They even masturbate to the thought of it.
But this doesn’t mean they’ll enjoy the real thing.
You’ve probably fantasised about getting into a fist fight…
…only to discover that the real thing is never as exciting or as glamorous as you imagined.
Sports and video games simulate the masculine desire for action and violence. But few men actually enjoy real war/combat.
The same is true with women. The female mind has a desire to be physically dominated. And only a masculine man can satisfy this desire.
The trick is to do it in a safe way that doesn’t harm women, and there are several sexual techniques for this.
I’ll go over a few here.
The first technique to dominate your girl physically is called the door slam.
When she’s standing with her back towards a door, grab her and slam her back into it.
Then press yourself against her and start making out with her aggressively.
This can also work with a wall, but it works much better with a door.
A door will have some “give” to it, so the force of the blow will be distributed across her back.
So you can slam her fairly hard without causing her too much pain.
In addition, a door will make a loud noise when you slam her into it, adding to the exciting Element of Dominance.
A wall will cause her more pain and will not make as much noise, but can do in a pinch.
Make sure she doesn’t hit her head during the slam. You can cup your hand behind her head to prevent this.
A second technique involves ripping her panties off.
Literally.
This works best when she’s wearing old panties and when she’s considerably aroused.
Put your hand inside them and twist them around your hand to make the ripping easier.
Then, pin her down to the bed with one hand, and pull hard to rip her panties off with the other.
Be sure you put some strength into it, as it will take more force to rip them off than you think.
Also, pull to the side so that the force of the rip goes into her hip, not her sensitive anal and vaginal areas.
Like the door slam, this creates the impression of Dominance without excessive pain.
Yet another way to establish Dominance is by pulling her hair.
To do this, grab her hair as close to the roots as possible and gently (but firmly) pull her head wherever you want.
This works well when you’re behind her, sucking on her neck. Simply hold her by the hair while you do this and she’ll love it.
Once you experience how a girl reacts to having her hair pulled, you’ll reach a whole new level of sexual understanding and awareness.
It’s most effective (as with other Dominance techniques) when a girl is ovulating.
For example, I once invited a girl over but she suggested the next week, so I knew she was on her period.
She came over the next week as agreed, and we watched TV on the couch for a bit.
Now, I’m not sure you know this, but girls shit test harder when they’re ovulating.
Even if they really like you.
This is because their bodies are subconsciously filtering for dominant men to impregnate them during their fertile window.
I already knew this, so I wasn’t surprised when this normally quiet girl started trying to wrestle with me on the couch.
I basically trapped her in a bear hug and leg lock, then continued to watch the movie in silence.
She struggled for a few moments, realised she couldn’t move an inch, then said “okay” and went back to her best behaviour.
I knew she was getting aroused at this point, so I began getting handsy with her.
A few minutes later she was riding my dick (at my instruction) with her back to me.
I had the presence of mind to try the hair pull for the first time.
I grabbed her ponytail and pulled her head back with a firm but gentle tug.
She went wild. She placed her hand on my thigh for support, arched her back, and began to ride me harder.
Women love being dominated, and their bodies instinctively know how to respond to a dominant man.
Dominant Fucking
Before I talk about the actual act of sex, I need to make a small detour and talk about ejaculation control.
Sex is a marathon, not a sprint. And it doesn’t make any sense to pound a girl as hard as you can if you’re only going to last 10 seconds.
You need to “warm” yourself up first.
Now, ejaculation control, from my experience, comes down to four things:
- Hormones (peak testosterone)
- Frequent sex (lots of practice)
- Mindset
- Technique (warming up your body)
I first noticed I gained self-control when my body fat dropped to 10% and I was fucking different girls during the week.
I had three girls on rotation. One on Friday, another on Sunday, and the third on Tuesday.
So the longest I went without sex in a week was two consecutive days (Wednesday and Thursday).
The frequency and variety helped me build up practice, but they also helped my mindset.
How? Well, I knew I was going to get laid during the week no matter what happened, so I didn’t feel any pressure to orgasm.
I realised I could actually fuck three different girls hard without cumming (which totally screwed with their minds).
When you know you can always ejaculate one or two days later, your mind moves from scarcity to abundance.
Girls understand this on a subconscious level. If you’re not cumming with them, then you must be cumming with someone else.
And this makes them want your seed even more.
Now, here’s how to warm yourself up: Use just the tip, the first three inches of your dick, for the first 5-10 minutes.
It’s not physically dominant but it demonstrates discipline and outcome independence, while getting you in the zone.
Also remember the female G-spot is just three inches deep from the vaginal entrance.
So you stimulate it directly just by using the tip of your dick.
You can add a physical dimension to the experience by holding her throat gently but firmly.
Don’t squeeze or choke her, that’s advanced stuff and you really need to know what you’re doing.
Plus she needs to be highly converted and accepting of all your other dominant behaviour in bed before you can go hardcore.
It’s possible to have intense sexual experiences with the barest hint of physical dominance.
So I suggest avoiding the hardcore physical stuff altogether.
Consider yourself warned.
Instead, hold her neck gently but firmly, then look down at her with the most intense look in your eyes.
Unwavering eye contact, like you’re gazing into her soul.
You’re the predator, and she’s your prey.
You’re the lion, and she’s a helpless gazelle.
Talk dirty to her as you fuck her with just the tip.
Occasionally slide all the way in slowly, and pull out slowly.
Painfully slowly, like you want her to feel every inch of you in detail.
If you do this well enough, the girl will crave you being deep inside her.
This will make her lose control, and she’ll buck her hips to try to fuck you.
But you must maintain your dominance and self-control.
I have a hypothesis about this warm-up technique.
I suspect quick ejaculation was a beta male strategy for passing on one’s seed during pre-civilisation days.
Think about it: a beta male would’ve been afraid of the sex being interrupted.
Either through being attacked by a rival, or by the woman changing her mind mid sex.
So beta males needed to be quick. They needed to shoot their load and scram.
But the alpha male wasn’t afraid of being attacked.
He’d defeated all his rivals, and the woman wanted him inside her. So he took his sweet time to enjoy himself.
You have at least one alpha ancestor, so this same behaviour is hardwired into you.
And warming up your dick for the first 10 minutes is a way of telling your body that you’re going to take your sweet time.
So you don’t need to get nervous about anything.
Result? Alpha state of mind unlocked.
Also, you’re basically getting all parts of your dick used to stimulation before you start to thrust harder.
You’re training your dick to get used to the sensation of being inside a pussy.
Think of it this way: If you dip your forefinger inside a glass of water, your finger will feel wet.
But leave your finger inside the glass long enough and that feeling of wetness will disappear.
This is because your body is more sensitive to changing sensations than constant sensations.
So when you spend the first 5-10 minutes using just the tip, you’re actually getting it used to the stimulation while also giving the woman intense physical pleasure.
Stop if you feel yourself inching towards ejaculation, calm down, then continue.
Your dick should feel “numb” to further stimulation after about 10 minutes of this.
You can then move on to more explosive sex.
Shove your dick all the way into her, stay deep, then fuck her.
Now, I’ve never fucked a girl so hard that she can’t walk afterwards.
Hard and deep is enough. Anything more than that is most guys exaggerating, in my opinion.
Besides, you want your girl ready to go several times in the week.
But as for technique…thrusting power comes from the glutes (your butt muscles).
They’re underdeveloped in most people but you can use weighted hip thrusts to train yours.
Some people use barbells. I use stacked plates, and don’t actually go heavy (25 kg at 4 sets of 7 reps).
This will train your glutes by teaching you to squeeze and relax them.
You’ll use that same muscle motion to make sharp explosive thrusts during sex.
Sort of like clenching your fist and immediately relaxing it.
You’re mostly relaxed, and only tensing up for a split second.
You’ll do this with your dick as deep as possible, like you’re trying to fuck the girl’s pubic bone with yours.
This won’t stimulate you much, so you’ll last longer while giving her the dominance she craves.
You can alternate between this and using your whole body to fuck her, but focus on using your glutes’ explosive thrusts to last longer.
Sex is a marathon, not a sprint.
You now have a basic foundation for fucking women and a physically and psychologically dominant way.
But remember Dominance is only one pillar of sexual mastery.
Although dirty talk can be a very powerful tool, girls will begin to react negatively towards it if it’s the only kind of talking you do in bed.
It’s important for you to combine dirty talk with emotional talk – the two are not mutually exclusive.
Rather, they enhance each other when used at the same time.
And I’ll introduce you to Emotion (the second pillar of sexual mastery) in the next Secret.
Till we meet again.
May you grow stronger and stronger, without limit, in all things.
AJ Newport (@LearnThisSecret)
